I remember the days we felt alive. The music was loud and we were singing along. The best of friends then and the best of friends we’ll always be in those memories. No matter how far we’ve drifted apart and whatever the fall outs were, those memories still exist and they’re still cherished. In that way, we’re all still friends forever, because of the memories. You don’t have to live in the present every minute of every day. Memories can make you smile just as much as the present and they can make you smile when it’s impossible to do so in the present. “Don’t live in the past” is a negative statement telling you to let go of things. But we’re all alive in the past just as much as we’re alive now.

And for those who have gone to a better place and left us here without them, they’re alive in the past because they lived then. That’s the purpose of memories… to remember what we no longer have and smile.

No one uses the word “memories” for anything negative. Remember a time when you were smiling so wide your mouth hurt and a time when you were laughing so hard you cried. Tell me you didn’t smile.

New tattoo. Written for me by Bill Beckett himself.



This makes five.

http://tinyurl.com/c5jleg

Another guy did Les Mis on Britain's Got Talent and he might not sound as good as Susan but I like him more.

Yeah, got my Hey Monday/This Prov tickets. Not looking forward to a hometown Friday Night Boys show but what are you gonna do? I'm excited.

A zillion pics of my new apartment (and my cat) that I am so very excited about, especially now that I've finished packing. I'm still working on it here and there but this is the general picture.

( Oh my, my Virginia )

Also. SERIOUSLY. Watch this and watch this now, especially if you love Les Miserables like me. http://perezhilton.com/2009-04-12-susan-boyle

Hello Butch Walker fan!



Congratulations on being one of the first 30 ticket buyers! You have won a special Soundcheck Party Meet & Greet with Butch Walker for the upcoming show on March 19th, 2009!



To ensure entrance to the Soundcheck Party Meet & Greet, please arrive at the venue NO LATER than 2 HOURS PRIOR to doors (door time is 8:00 pm) and congregate in the general vicinity of the Box Office while forming a separate line. Be sure to bring a photo ID, your ticket to the event, and a printed copy of THIS email to ensure entrance. Please do not wander off, as a representative of the band will come to you around this time to escort you into the exclusive Soundcheck Party Meet and Greet.



If cameras are allowed into the venue, you are more than welcome to take pictures with the band (*please contact the venue directly about its camera policy). *NO VIDEO CAMERAS AND NO PROFESSIONAL CAMERAS. Please bring a copy of your ticket purchase confirmation email and a valid photo ID. You will receive ONE Meet & Greet pass for EACH ticket purchased. Please do not arrive late, as late arrivals will not be permitted.



If you have any questions, please don't hesitate to respond to this email or call Artist Arena at (212) 420-8500. We hope you enjoy the show and thank you again for your never ending support.

RIP Grandma. I love you.

I knew this was going to happen today. What is with me and my crazy feelings?

YOU'RE ON MY FRIENDS LIST, I WANNA KNOW YOU...I want to know 33 things about you. I don't care if we never talk, never liked each other, or if we already know everything about each other. Short and sweet is fine...You're on my list, so I wanna know you better! :)

1. Can you cook? I can make the best spicy chicken ever.
2. What was your dream growing up? To be in a band.
3. What talent do you wish you had? If I could sing, that'd be awesome.
4. Favorite place? My cousin's house in Puyallup, WA.
5. Favorite vegetable? Carrots.
6. What was the last book you read? I'm working on reading a book called Dark at the Roots.
7. What zodiac sign are you ? Cancer.
8. Any Tattoos and/or Piercings? Four tattoos and my ears are pierced.
9. Worst Habit? I guess smoking.
10. Do we know each other outside of lj? Yes, ma'am.
11. What is your favorite sport? I only watch them but baseball, football and hockey.
12. Negative or Optimistic attitude? I try to be optimistic but I'm just a realist, really. Neither one.
13. What would you do if you were stuck in an elevator with me? Probably act retarded.
14. Worst thing to ever happen to you? Finding my mom with a bullet in her mouth. SORRY, I KNOW IT'S DEPRESSING BUT IT'S TRUE!
15. Tell me one weird fact about you: I hate sauce on my pizza.
16. Do you have any pets? I have a kitty named Cadence.
17. Do you know how to do the macerana? Yes, I certainly do.
18. What time is it where you are now? 3:47 pm
19. Do you think clowns are cute or scary? Scary as fuck oh my god.
20. If you could change one thing about how you look, what would it be? My weight.
21. Would you be my crime partner or my conscience? Both at the exact same time, that's what I always do.
22. What color eyes do you have? Blue.
23. Ever been arrested? No, just pulled over a bunch and "spoken to".
24. Bottle or Draft? I don't like beer, yucky.
25. If you won $10,000 dollars today, what would you do with it? Pay my bills and move.
26. What kind of bubble gum do you prefer to chew? I hate bubble gum.
27. What 's your favorite bar to hang at? I don't really hang at bars but Arlene's Grocery in the city has the best drinks. Brittany's in VA is awesome, too, even if it's hokey.
28. Do you believe in ghosts? I used to say no but yeah, I do.
29. Favorite thing to do in your spare time? Sit on the computer, drive, listen to music.
30. Do you swear a lot? Oh yeah.
31. Biggest pet peeve? People who hang up on me.
32. In one word, how would you describe yourself? Annoyed.
33. Will you repost this so I can fill it out and do the same for you? Well, I did that.

Name: Alexandra
Date: 2/14/2009
Colorgenics Number: 15324706


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


You have always longed for tenderness, love and a sensitivity of feeling into which you would like to blend. You are a very gentle warm person and responsive to 'All things bright and beautiful'. This personifies a caring person, a person who 'needs' and indeed 'needs to be needed'.

You are a leader in every sense of the word. You know where you are going and you know what you need to do in order to get there. You exercise an inherent initiative in overcoming obstacles and difficulties. You either hold, or wish to achieve, a position of authority by means of which full control can be exerted over events.

Matters are not progressing as well as you would have hoped and you are having to make concessions - but you still believe that your goals are realistic it's just that people can't seem to see your point of view. You know what you want but you'll only accept suggestions under duress.

You are holding back. You need to find friends in whom you can trust and once they have proved themselves beyond all possible doubt you will be prepared to give them your all. The existing situation is not of your liking - you have an unsatisfied need for mental stimulation with others whose standards are as high as your own. Trying to control your instincts the way you do restricts your ability to open up to others and the way you feel at this time is suggestive of 'total surrender'. This is not to your liking as you consider such thoughts as weaknesses that need to be overcome. You feel that only by control, controlling your innermost thoughts, are you able to maintain your air of superiority. You want to be admired for yourself alone and not for what you can do or for what you may have done. In essence 'you need to be needed' and at the same time 'you need to need'.

You would like to be respected and valued for yourself and this can only be achieved from within a close and harmonious relationship.

PERSONAL SIDE NOTE: Whoa... That's freaky.



http://www.goldinuniverse.com

i have a headache.

i have an appointment with the orthopedic doctor (or however it's spelled) tomorrow because my other knee is completely busted. like i can barely function on it busted.

i have a couple of crap friends but it's cool, such is life.

my best friend jamie's cousin killed himself yesterday.

that makes me paranoid because when bad things happen to her, they happen to me a few months later and this is no joke. it's like fate forced us together for that reason.

i miss virginia more and more every day.

THE BRIGHT SIDE IS: the academy is acoustic in store on friday in delaware. the academy is acoustic show on saturday at my hometown gig, jammin java. also seeing jamie as i do this because it's important.



do you know who matters to you?

Virgin Mary Garbage



For my long drive down to Delaware tomorrow to try to get to be one of 30 people to see TAI play acoustic at Hot Topic. I really hate myself for this lmao. But yay I get to go visit Ann!

Where is Elise?

Nevermind I found her.

What did you do in 2008 that you'd never done before?
got recognized multiple times by my favorite band

Did you keep your new years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
i don't make those ever

Did anyone close to you give birth?
in a couple weeks my childhood best friend/first boyfriend's wife is going to have a little girl named alyssa

Did anyone close to you die?
someone i knew did, yes, but i wasn't super close to her. very nice lady though, it was sad.

What countries did you visit?
this one

What would you like to have in 2009 that you lacked in 2008?
home

What date from 2008 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
may 9th, it's when i moved away from virginia. april 9th, getting to see pat's band play in seattle for the first time.

What was your biggest achievement of the year?
moving out of virginia and finding out how much i actually love it. but at least i got to move out and see!

What was your biggest failure?
lmao moving out of virginia.

Did you suffer illness or injury?
i messed up my knee.

What was the best thing you bought?
my macbook!

Whose behaviour merited celebration?
barack obama

Whose behaviour made you appalled?
sarah palin

Where did most of your money go?
bills, moving

What did you get really, really, really excited about?
moving, seeing tai three times

What song will always remind you of 2008?
disturbia, it's everywhere

Compared to this time last year, are you...
happier or sadder? sadder
thinner or fatter? fatter
richer or poorer? poorer

What do you wish you'd done more of?
stayed in virginia

What do you wish you'd done less of?
moving

How will you be spending New Years Eve?
i'm not sure!

Did you fall in love in 2008?
i did not

How many one-night stands?
none

What was your favourite TV program?
the l word, true blood, house md

Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
yes

What was the best book you read?
i don't know if i made it through a book this year

What was your greatest musical discovery?
the gaslight anthem

What did you want and get?
good music

What was your favourite film of this year?
the dark knight

What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
i went to virginia and just hung out with my family and a friend or two. i turned 22.

What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
being able to move back to va.

How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2008?
it was the year of moving away from band t-shirts.

What kept you sane?
virginia, tai, pat

Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
william beckett, mainly. barack obama.

What political issue stirred you the most?
sarah palin. john mccain not listening at all. barack obama inspiring a nation.

Who did you miss?
my mom like usual. my friends in virginia/maryland. STEVIE!

Who were the best new people you met?
cc, lindsey and amy were all pretty cool

Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2008.
sometimes you really do have to mess up to find the truth.

Quote a song lyric that sums up your year:
And if you sing to me sweet until then,
I may never sail Virginia again.
And as this current moves slow for me,
This much you must know, we'll meet again.
And El, I'll have you know I'm scared to death.
- Mayday Parade

The 'Be Pete Wentz' poetry meme
01. Put your music player on shuffle
02. The first lines of twenty songs = a poem
03. The first line of the twenty-first song = the title

"When The Man Spoke, The People Listened"

I am a man cut from the know
When I was young lying in the grass
I just found a friend in one of your lies
Crawling through the dense green carpeting
It hasn't been that long since we drank to the sunset until it was gone

I'm standing here before you and I know I'm such a wreck
I know who you remind me of
I know what you're doing I see it all too clear
Cross the street from your storefront cemetery
I'm gonna let the city take her

I've got emotion dripping out my pores
His head was a city of paper buildings
And so it begins, another chapter unfolds
I'll stare into the mirror just long enough to feel
You change your mind like a girl changes clothes

Hey Brittany, why are you messing with me?
I keep my seven on the list
Tell me how I finally figured it out
Don't try and tell me you've been looking at me
They can't see your heart they don't care to see who you are

Yesterday was the best day ever.

Woke up early as hell on my own and Priscilla woke up to get Britney Spears tickets because, honestly, even if it ends up being a trainwreck, at least we can say we saw the wreck in person. Otherwise, even though I don’t like her it could be very cool and I’ve never seen a 360 degree show like this one is going to be so I’d like to experience that.

After that Priscilla found out from her ex that Petco was taking pictures of your pets with Santa for charity where the proceeds went to homeless animals. We decided to be crazy cat ladies and take our cats to meet Santa and it actually ended up being a lot of fun and it was my cat’s first experience with dogs which she did very well with until a golden lab puppy wanted to try to play with her.

Then we took the cats home and went to the T-Mobile store so Priscilla could talk to them about potentially getting a Blackberry and found out that their Blackberry plans are ridiculous.

We went to this mom and pop pizza place across the shopping plaza that we’d never been to because we were starving and had some of the best pizza I’ve had lately. Not as good as the pizza from the pizza place near Starland Ballroom, but still delicious.

Then we went across the highway to the AT&T store and I immediately said I wanted an iPhone and I didn’t care about cancellation charges with T-Mobile. The girl said I was her easiest sale ever. I was like yep, I’m always easy. Oh puns. The many puns.

Got my Twitter updates to work on my phone finally.

Then Pretty Woman was on. I love Julia Roberts, she reminds me of my mom. Then something else good was on but I forget what it was.

Then it snowed. The first (magical Christmas) snow of the year. I’m still a kid forever.

Then we watched Cruel Intentions.

Then the Fall Out Boy album leaked and it’s really good. Still buying it the 16th and you should, too.

I’m telling you, it was the best day ever.